Learning to Advocate for Yourself at Work & School
Advocating for yourself when you’re neurodivergent can feel like standing in front of a crowd with your shoelaces tied together. You know what you need, but finding the right words—and the confidence—to explain it can be tough. I’ve been there many times, especially before I truly understood my learning differences.
This chapter focuses on self-advocacy in academic and workplace settings. While I’ll be sharing from my own experience with NVLD, these strategies apply to other learning challenges too—such as autism, ADHD, or dyslexia.
Discovering My Needs in College
I didn’t receive my NVLD diagnosis until halfway through college, between my sophomore and junior years. Until then, I was still figuring out how I learned best—and how to explain that to others.
At first, I struggled to articulate to professors what kind of help I needed. I often knew something was wrong, but not how to fix it. After I went through diagnostic testing, things became much clearer. I understood my challenges, my strengths, and how to bridge the gap between them.
Once I knew why I struggled with certain tasks, it became easier to explain my needs to professors, classmates, and even friends. I wasn’t asking for “special favors”—I was asking for tools to help me succeed.
The Accommodations That Changed Everything
Here are the accommodations that made the biggest difference for me in college:
Textbooks in audio format – I used a program called Kurzweil 3000. Hearing the material while reading helped me retain information and take better notes.
Lecture recordings – I used Audio Notetaker (later called Sonocent) to record lectures, insert PowerPoint slides, and type notes at the same time. This was a lifesaver for test prep and essay writing.
Extended test time – An extra hour and a half reduced my anxiety and allowed me to focus on demonstrating what I knew instead of racing the clock.
Private testing space – Fewer distractions meant better focus. Sometimes, I was even able to have my emotional support dog, Truffles, with me.
Formula sheets and calculator use in math – Remembering when to use formulas was easy; memorizing all the symbols was not.
These tools didn’t just make school easier—they gave me the confidence to speak up about what I needed.
The Role of Supportive People
Self-advocacy isn’t just about knowing what you need—it’s also about building relationships with people who get you.
My mom learned how to help me with essay writing by focusing on proofreading and flow, while my graduate student instructor (GSI) Alex helped me connect class readings to my writing assignments. They both worked in their strengths, which meant I got the help I needed without either of them feeling overwhelmed.
Learning to Advocate in the Workplace
Workplaces were trickier for me at first. When I started my first job after college, I didn’t yet know how to explain my NVLD to employers. I was still figuring out the challenges I might face on the job—like managing time when driving to unfamiliar places or balancing multiple tasks without getting bogged down in details.
Even now, working for my parents, I sometimes need to step back and reframe problems so they’re easier to solve. For example, helping my mom select songs for her Sunday services can become a time-consuming puzzle if I get too caught up in missing details—like finding the exact artist for a piece of music. My therapist helped me realize that having a backup song ready could streamline the process and reduce frustration.
Insights from Experts
I’ve learned a lot from reading other advocates’ work. Here are three takeaways from articles that have shaped my approach:
Create safe spaces
Dr. Lee recommends therapy as a place to celebrate strengths, solve problems, and strategize for work challenges—not to “fix” you. I’ve found this true in my therapy sessions.Recognize sensory and processing needs
Stephen M. Shore shares scenarios that highlight challenges like fluorescent lights, distracting noises during tests, and masking in relationships. While I don’t have autism, I relate to these experiences because of my chronic migraines and difficulty with certain test conditions.Advocate for inclusion, not just acceptance
JR Reid writes about the goal of uniting neurodivergent and neurotypical people simply as “people.” I connect deeply with this vision. Too often, neurodivergent individuals are pushed to the margins—not always intentionally, but it happens.
Self-Advocacy Beyond Work and School
Advocacy isn’t only about academics and careers—it’s also about social life and relationships.
For example, I’m upfront in dating about certain communication challenges, like missing sarcasm. I don’t share everything at once, but I try to be honest early on so the other person understands how I communicate. Unfortunately, not everyone is willing to date someone who’s neurodivergent—but that says more about them than it does about me.
Whether in dating, friendship, or community involvement, self-advocacy means giving others the information they need to treat you with respect and understanding.
Key Lessons for Self-Advocacy
From my journey and the wisdom of others, here’s what I’ve learned:
Know yourself first – Understanding your learning style and challenges is essential before you can explain them to others.
Be specific – General requests for “help” aren’t as effective as clearly defined needs.
Use the tools available – Accommodations and assistive technology exist for a reason.
Communicate early – Waiting until you’re struggling makes advocacy harder.
Seek allies – Supportive people can amplify your voice.
Stay authentic – Masking is exhausting; being yourself builds genuine understanding.
Closing Thoughts
Self-advocacy is a lifelong skill. It may start in school, but it extends to the workplace, relationships, and every other part of life. Whether you’re neurodivergent, neurotypical, or somewhere in between, learning to speak up for yourself is one of the most empowering things you can do.
I hope my experiences and these insights help you—or someone you care about—feel more equipped to navigate academic, professional, and personal challenges. Because at the end of the day, we all deserve the tools, understanding, and respect we need to thrive.
